50 Hilarious Apocalyptic Opinions From The Web
According to a crazy religious leader named Harold Camping, the world is supposed to end this Saturday. This guy has predicted the end before, but this time he swears he’s right. Since none of us can be certain, we here at Fork Party have been stocking up on porn and weaponry for the last few days. Here are 50 examples of how other people on our planet are taking to the news via their Twitter and Tumblr accounts. We have also included some very blasphemous renditions of “The Last Supper” to secure our place in the fiery depths of Hell… this Saturday.
@Atlanticwire: Anyone interested in a “Rapture Party” on May 21? There’ll be atheists…and punch:
@TiltBreaker: End of the world pickup lines: “That outfit tells me you’re going to hell anyway”
@KayCrack: Damn so the world is gonna end this saturday? That means I won’t get to see who wins the #NBAfinals NOOOOOOOO!! #may21st
@newser: May 21 Prediction Boosts Business for Post-Apocalypse Pet Care Company http://bit.ly/jU07zg
@LacySykesJr: The rapture will not take place on May 21, 2011. However, if it does, I’ll be on an airplane, so I get 2 meet Jesus B4 u!
@DanKimball: If rapture happens on May 21 as predicted, we’ll miss release of Lady Gaga’s new album May 23. // Thank heavens. Pray hard!
@bestycoastyy: Since judgement day is apparently on the 21st I’m just gonna eat everything I’ve ever wanted to eat on the 20th and then peace out.
@ilovebiiiiieber: I hope on judgement day justin bieber comes to save me
@misswaypastfine: Why is Wal-Mart trending O.o — its packed cuz ppl think the end of the world is Saturday
@4vrannaday: I’m really banking on it being the end of the world saturday.
@drumminlogan: Was going to mow my lawn but then realized the end of the world is on Saturday and decided to drink a beer instead.
@clarkekant: If Harold Camping is so sure about his prediction for the end of the world on Saturday, why does his ministry continue to accept donations?
@NitaBeenWinning: Guess I’ll tell everyone what I REALLY think of them since the world will end soon!
@FakeJDGreear: I hope Harold Camping heard God right. Because if the raptors are coming on Saturday, I’m not prepared after all. #May21
@RaganFox: I keep forgetting that the end of the world is Saturday. I have to remember to buy silly string. And funny hats. #May21
@datachick: Don’t forget to sign up for the Post Rapture Looting event on Facebook. We’re organizing our work for the weekend. #May21 #Heathen
@NevSchulman: End of Days this weekend! I’m following @JesusChrist just to be safe.
@someecards: Let’s party like the world’s ending Saturday and continue partying when it doesn’t. some.ly/ilkIod
@joelmchale: It’s my understanding the world is ending Saturday. Could I borrow someone’s Porsche 911 turbo S or Audi R8 v10? I have some jumping to do
@HappyMarriedMe: Considering the loan I just took out, the world better be ending.
@fuggirls: Paris Hilton has ANOTHER reality show? Maybe the world WILL end this weekend. – J
@TheRealGoSoHard: Cant wait till this end of the world party this weekend. Gettin bent i hear Jesus buyin everybody shots Saturday. I got the FB invite
@witheiler: Best part about the end of the world zealots: that they think doomsday will follow timezones #gmt
@AG_323: I don’t slander any religion or claims they make. Cause if the world does end on Saturday yall gonna be like “I’m in hell thanks 2 Twitter”
@ThePeerless: End of the World…is it really the end, or will we see it on FX in syndication for another thousand years?
Tumblr
operationfailure: I hope this Saturday’s rapture is just like Blondie’s Rapture.
madaboutthenews: Urban Dictionary – apocalypse sex You just know there are some guys out there working the Judgement Day chicks for apocalypse sex.
itinerantcerebrum: The forecast calls for Rapture!
infinitesingularity: This is why you don’t send kids to school with out basic combat training.
danhanlon: May 21st Doomsday??
I’m gonna be kind of mad if the apocalypse is on the day of my college graduation. I mean, 17 years of school just to be annihilated by flaming asteroids and world demolishing earthquakes just as I’m being handed my diploma? Can’t the rapture at least wait a few weeks?
thetellingtruth: combining zelda and the may 21st doomsday theory? you betcha. the hero of time now has 3 day to summon the four giants and push the moon back.
whatsthesymbology: That awkward moment when you wake up May 22nd.
LOL you silly religious folk and your apocalypses.
scneptune: Oh P.S. I don’t know if you guys have seen a few signs around town, but just as a friendly reminder; the world is gunna end on saturday.
Why God? Why did you have to pick a Saturday?
deannaisonfire: Am I dying May 21, 2011 or December 21, 2012?
steppenrat: its nice that my local gun show coincides with the zombie apocalypse
rambles-and-shambles: Well, at least if it’s really over on Saturday, I won’t have any split ends
yellyjellybean: The only way i’ll be okay with the apocalypse is if everyone busts into the Thriller dance every once in a while.
the things i think about in the shower…
thisisnotdan: So the apocalypse comes may 21st apparently…
…its a bit hard to care about my exam revision now
Burythemfast: OH MY, Jesus Christ’s second coming is this saturday? I guess I have a lot of apologizing to do for believing in science and common sense. Sorry for being logical Jesus, I hope you can forgive me.
justinpdrew: I actually hope that the world ends this Saturday.
If it does, the way I’ve been living my life up until this point makes complete sense.
annuschka: So the world’s ending on Saturday.
But my best friend and I are still going to see the new Pirates of the Caribbean!
ratchxcore: One reason the end of the world won’t be 5/21/11; Kanye will come interrupt Jesus and all the chaos.
sinwithagrinx:
Dear “The World”
Okay. Seriously, you CAN’T end on Saturday. Shinedown’s new album doesn’t come out until late 2012. How dare you try and end the world before that happens?
-Sincerely,
A disgruntled stan.
iplaywithfiretobreaktheice: I hear it’s the end of the world this Saturday
I don’t know about you guys but I plan on staying down here for the 5 months of Hell on Earth. Apparently we’ll have internet connection.
nittiotvaan: So…what’s this talk about Saturday being the end of the world? It can’t end…at least not until I get to see the finale of Glee and a Brittana kiss
seaandtherhythm: Saturday is Judgement Day… Come at me bro… I’ll keep dancing. Even AFTER the zombies come.
repostsandmusingsandbears: Who else is gonna be there for this?
I’m definitely going. Expect me to make a bee-line for the local Mercedes dealership at the first sign of disappearing people
cartoonic: I am so ready for the Raptor. There’s a reason Humans are still around and dinosaurs aren’t. We win, every time.
you-should-f**k-me-since-i: Want A shirt that says either “My First Apocalypse†or “My parents were Raptured and all I got was this stupid shirt.
brightcitylight: I heard about the coming Raptors on May 21st.
Make sure you replace all door handles with knobs. I hear they can’t open them. Godspeed.
Anonymous: I better not die May 21st. I gotta 30 Seconds to Mars Tattoo i need to get before I die.
Read: 9 Films To Prepare You For Judgement Day [Screen Junkies]
