It Puts the Vodka in its Eye (Videos)

Vodka tampons. Anal beer bongs. Jello shots…? The methods of ingesting alcohol is a long list, and it’s only getting longer — and dumber. The truth telling fact lovers over at Fox News have recently covered ‘eyeballing’, or the process of forcing vodka into your freaking eye. Here’s the report, plus some videos of people who are begging for blindness.

Vodka tampon sounds like it burns, but not as much as vodka in the eye. Not only is this retarded because of how likely it is to eventually damage the sensitive layers on the eye and cause blindness, but it can make you look ridiculous in another way as well. Who wants red, puffy, wet, runny eyes at a party? Oh girl, your bloodshot vodka eyes are so sexy. Come here, you smelly little fool.

‘Kids our generation are just big risk takers’ says one girl. Really? Is that what you think? That’s what I thought about my generation, too. When kids in high school were jumping off rooftops and dying, breaking their arms trying to skateboard steep hills, and figuring out other ways to painfully imitate Jackass. It turns out that kids in high school are just dumb as hell and there’s always at least one kid who will try anything as long as they think other people will like them better for it. Kids: risky or stupid idiot dum dums?