Panda Poop Tea Coming Soon

Some guy is trying to make what he hopes will become the world’s most expensive tea — by using panda poo to create it.


An Yanshi recently received a license for developing a panda poop tea, and claims that it may soon be selling for $343USD per 50 grams of the stuff. Since only 30% of nutrition is absorbed by pandas from their food, the other 70% goes into their poop, says Yanshi. He wants to harvest that rejected nutrition for the tea, creating a potion which will apparently contain twice the anti-cancer properties of regular green tea.

Many experts, however, are calling his claims ‘pseudoscientific theory’ with no real evidence to back it up. “An’s idea has enlightened us that we should also use panda excrement to cultivate other ‘national crops’ such as rice, flower, etc, and sell them at sky-high prices,” says one skeptic. He certainly has a point.

After all, many people are willing to shell out extra cash for alcohol with literally useless gold flakes inside of it (ooh pretty and fancy!), USB ports that are shaped like ‘cool characters’, and other costly nonsense simply because it has novelty.