Friday is all about extremes. Extreme hairstyles, extreme titties, extremely awkward situations, and extremely weird boners.
Rick Santorum is my favorite presidential candidate. He’s embarked on a meaningless (and most likely hypocritical — stay tuned) crusade against homosexuality, claims to hate porn (which he also wants to banish), and… Actually, I can’t begin to describe the angelic genius that is Rick Santorum, so I’ll just leave you with a few of his best quotes:
“One of the things I will talk about, that no president has talked about before, is I think the dangers of contraception in this country. It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be. [Sex] is supposed to be within marriage. It’s supposed to be for purposes that are yes, conjugal…but also procreative. That’s the perfect way that a sexual union should happen…This is special and it needs to be seen as special.”
~ Rick Santorum, opposing contraception and frighteningly suggesting that he would make pre-marital sex illegal.
“The idea is that the state doesn’t have rights to limit individuals’ wants and passions. I disagree with that. I think we absolutely have rights because there are consequences to letting people live out whatever wants or passions they desire.”
~Rick Santorum, declaring that government has the right to limit people from pursuing their dreams.
“I don’t want to go to a trade war, I want to beat China. I want to go to war with China and make America the most attractive place in the world to do business.”
~Rick Santorum, stating that he wants a war with China.