In the bare-knuckled world of carbonated malt liquor drinks, few have stood the test of time – but those that do get their own drinking games.
Take Smirnoff Ice for example. When the whole ‘icing your bros’ phase was heavily rolling through North America, sales for Smirnoff probably increased a few percent, but they totally wimped out when they claimed that they were shocked and appalled that their product was being used in such an ‘inappropriate manner’. Yeah, right. You mean to tell us that people ‘responsibly drink and enjoy’ your horrendously sweet sugar-water-booze? That’s laughable.
With the recent uprising in Four Loko (or, 4Loko), we can probably expect to see certain trends rising in popularity by using this foul Jolly Rancher flavored malt liquor.
Here are five drinking games you could play with Four Loko, based on already popular drinking games:
Four Loko Pong
Without a doubt, beer pong is popular with the college crowd, if not the most popular drinking game you can competitively play. Now, if you replaced the beer in your cups with Four Loko, you can almostÂ guaranteeÂ that the degree of enthusiasm will spike from gentle tossing, to bloodsport. Taurine and guarana, some of the most common ingredients in energy drinks get your heart going whether or not you are even moving. Combine that with the thrill of any competitive sport, and you’ve got ragingly drunk men throwing a tiny ball into a cup and flipping tables over from the adrenaline rush.
Why it seems like a good idea: Makes beer pong look likeÂ child’s play.
Why you may end up regretting playing: Four Loko’s effects aside, you’re going to have blood to clean up off of the floors, not to mention numerous broken lamps, etc.
Loko-ing Your Bros
Much like the accidental success of a viral campaign that Smirnoff had nothing to do with, Loko-ing your bros could catch on if they started serving them in smaller portions. Nobody can chug a tallboy of that carbonated swamp juice without their eyes rolling into the back of their skulls. Some of the greatest ‘icing’ stories involved the element of surprise, like leaving one in the shower for your roommate to discover before going to work. Four Loko would likely get said roommate fired if he successfully downed it.
Why it seems like a good idea: Gets you intoxicated, quickly.
Why you may end up regretting playing: Barf. Everywhere. On your bosses desk, on your Xbox, just everywhere. Avoid at all costs.
If you’re not familiar with Edward 40-hands, you can familiarize yourself here. If you are – you may already be intrigued at how it would play out if everyone was amped and trying to unzip their pants to use the washroom. Now, the premise is pretty simple: you tape a can of Four Loko to each hand (so, you’re consuming 32 ounces of LoKo, bro!) – and you’re not allowed to use your hands for anything until your drinks are completely finished. The hilarity that will come from everyone blacking out will be (hardly) remembered for years to come!
Why it seems like a good idea: We don’t actually think this sounds like a good idea.
Why you may end up regretting playing: You’ll black out for two days straight, just because you were trying to go to the washroom.
Four Loko Flip Cup
Another popular drinking game at college, as you may have guessed, is flippy cup. As the common theme of this post goes, you shouldn’t be surprised that we’re replacing the beer with Four Loko.
Why it seems like a good idea: You won’t realize your own strength after pounding back some Loko, so your accuracy may go to sh*t.
Why you may end up regretting playing: We don’t really see any down-side to this. Minus the taste.
If you’re bored enough to play these and take videos or photos, send em our way – webmaster [at] forkparty.com