James Brown’s Excellent Signage in Telulah, MS (Pics)

The county road along I-10E through Mississippi is lined with a whole lot of nothing. In the middle of all that nothing is Telulah, Mississippi, a small town that takes up about one or two miles of road with tiny storefronts. Though most of them are dilapidated and seem to be out of business, their hand-painted signs are 10/10 and all done by one local resident, James Brown.

OkCupid Weirdos Picture Dump (Pics)

OkCupid is my favorite cesspool.

Quotes From my 2-Year-Old Self

My mom kept a diary of all the weird crap I said before I could do it myself.

4-11-90
“Drew please stop that! No! DREW.”
“Mommy leave me alone or I’ll tear your vagina off.”

My Awesome Childhood Pog Collection (89 Pics)

Plus an old advertisement for Thrasher magazine. It came with Radical Rex, only one of the best games for Super Nintendo ever.

Inside Information: The Zoolander-Esque World of Male Modeling

Written by a friend of mine who wishes to remain anonymous. “My best friend is gay, but I like to do things in this business the straight way.  There’s a lot of people that will try to push you to see how far you’ll go, but I don’t do that.”

We were less than 24 hours away from watching him lie on the cement in with another male model, both clad in nothing but tight white underwear.

Debating the Talent and Credibility of OJ Da Juiceman

My conversation with a guy who considers himself to be the ultimate authority on all things hip-hop. He hates on OJ Da Juiceman so hard he almost pisses blood all over himself.

You can tell which one is me because I am very clearly educated on the fact that Young Joo Man, goddammit he’s the shiiit.

I Went to a Weird Cat Show in the Small Town of Milford, PA (Pics and Videos)

My account of a cat show that I stumbled upon in the small town of Milford, PA. Crazy cat ladies, angry cats, kitty piss, furry testicles, competition, and strange creatures abound.

Terrible, Tacky Tourist Gear From Myrtle Beach, SC (12 Pics)

Herp derp, I went to the beach. People were actually wearing these. At one point, a crew of 7-8 guys passed us by wearing DTF shirts and grilled every one of us, even my friend’s mom. More like “Desperate to F*ck.”

My Toothless Dog Eating Noodles (9 Pics)

Laser Beam loves noodles, cat poop, wet cereal, dog food soup, pieces of dirt, and anything else he can swallow whole. He’s 13. I got him from the shelter last year, when he was a dirty piece of matted fur. Due to severe neglect, all of his teeth had to be removed. Laser Beam don’t give a shit.

How to Lose at Bingo (DEVIL MACHINES ARE RUINING THE GAME) (Pics)

Bingo halls are miserable utopias of morbidly obese chainsmokers, crumpling papers, dirty looks, grease, drugged up old people, kindly eccentrics who are usually alone, and a rainbow of dabbers. Many have begun to implement the use of tiny computers which are cheap to rent and can load hundreds of bingo cards for you, making the game as effortless as pressing a single button 5 or 6 times. It’s ruining the magic.