This looks very uncomfortable to have hanging off of your body, like walking around with one giant hardened tit clinging to your stomach. A big bundle of hardened fetuses rolled up in a ball. A tumor of food and fatness.

Moonwalk Fail

Risky Business Fail

Pole Dancing Fail Compilation

“I reached down to grab the stick to move it out of the way, and the snake stretched out, turned around and got its fangs in my right hand,” he said. “I slung it off and I did a tap dance on it until it was dead.”

Craig was treated with six bags of anti-venom and currently cannot move two of his fingers. Somewhere in here is a joke about WalMart selling discounted poisonous snakes, or offering free painful deaths to those who win their accidental rattlesnake lottery. Welp, cya.

Airplanes are much safer than cars, but I’m just more comfortable holding my life in my own reckless hands than letting my fate be decided by the man in the sky (THE PILOT, GET IT?!!?!). Just thinking about flying makes me nervous. Where’s the Xanax?

Despite almost 40,000 protestors in the neighboring towns, City Council members agreed to make the historical site from a residential to a commercial zone. WalMart still faces the “obstacle” of gaining the approval of the state’s historical, environmental and transportation committees, but don’t worry — they can pay off all of them!

If you love watching the effects of meth drive others crazy, check out the “Christy” episode of intervention. Christy is a 24-year-old girl employed as a stripper and full time meth addict. She hangs out by the liquor store in her clear heels, singing awful Taking Back Sunday songs and begging dirty old men to buy her alcohol. She also speaks to God, or is God, and has developed skills as a mathematical genius. Sexy. Get it, girl!

Knocking Off is dedicated to finding the best of the worst knockoffs of toys, movies, video games, and whatever else can have its brand butchered and sent out into the dollar stores of the world.

I’ve no idea cos I’m not a head doctor but I do know it’s time to roll out another bunch of random funny fail photos.

Over the past month, almost ten students were forced to wear “the cone of shame” (as it’s called in the movie) like a dunce cap. Typically used to prevent dogs or cats from chewing at stitches or a wound, news of her bizarre and humiliating punishment has outraged parents and other staff alike. The superintendent has already strongly recommended she be fired, but is she overreacting?

Some students who wore the cone claimed that it had been as a joke, not punishment. A few of them even requested to wear it, finding it “hilarious.” Others expressed their concern that Bailey-Cutkomp would be unfairly fired over a harmless prank. Despite students speaking in the teacher’s defense, there are a few others who say they were embarrassed by the whole doggone thing.

And Bailey-CutKomp isn’t making a great case for herself, either. She told administrators that she thought it would be “a good way to redirect student behavior.”

In a time where everyone is stressing the importance teaching kids to stand up for themselves, it seems odd that those who did not want to participate didn’t simply refuse or report it immediately. “The cone of shame” is obviously a very bizarre practice, and most kids over the age of 11 would (or should) easily be able to tell that it’s inappropriate and illegal. Don’t parents teach their children that no one, not even teachers, are allowed to touch them or force them to do anything that makes them uncomfortable? Then again, the ‘stupid’ levels in Florida are off the doggone dumbass scale, so maybe it’s no surprise that a bunch of teenagers let some old hag strap a dog cone around their necks. This never would have happened in Brooklyn.