Fork Party

The Official Teaser Trailer For The New James Bond Movie Just Dropped

Mikey — Tue, 22 May 2012 17:09:06 +0000

Bond is back this October with Skyfall and the official teaser trailer has already clocked up over 1mm views in 24hrs.

Will 007′s latest adventure live up to the hype?

Visit the official site at http://www.007.com

Sanitation Trucks With Funny Slogans (20 Pics)

Mikey — Tue, 22 May 2012 16:04:36 +0000

The owners of these sanitation companies have a sense of humor when it comes to their work as you’ll see from the funny slogans they have painted on their poop trucks.

Just some good ‘clean’ fun.

50 Cute Hippie Girls (Pics)

Drew — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:33:19 +0000

Q: Which ones are real hippies, and which are just high-fashion models dressed up in other people’s clothes and who drink the blood of virgin slave-children to stay beautiful? A: Who cares? Tits.

Forget yummy yummy punk rock girls; smelly smelly hippie girls are way more likely to take their boobs out.

Hundreds of Pet Owls Discarded by Harry Potter Fans

Drew — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:23:59 +0000

So you bought an owl because you wanted to be like Harry Potter. It bit you, had really sharp claws, made a smelly mess in its tiny cage, and never learned to deliver your magical messages. Hundreds of disinterested Harry Potter fans have begun abandoning their pet owls in the woods, where they’ll starve and inevitably die, since a life of captivity has deprived the animals of hunting and survival skills needed to survive in the wild.

In the UK, owl ownership is legal without a license. Releasing the animal into the woods, however, is not — and is punishable by a £5,000 fine. It would therefore be easier just to drown the goddamn thing and make a beautiful pelt out of its skin. What’s so bad about that? Compared to the slow, painful death the owl will most likely endure over the course of days/weeks in the forest, you’d be doing it a favor of sorts.

J.K. Rowling has released a statement to those participating in the ~~Paris Hilton Chihuahua~~ owl craze:

“If anybody has been influenced by my books to think an owl would be happiest shut in a small cage and kept in a house, I would like to take this opportunity to say as forcefully as I can, ‘you are wrong’.”

Paris Hilton made tiny, overpriced chihuahuas very popular a few years ago. When even dirty whores realized that she was a dirty whore, slews of little chihuahuas were abandoned in shelters (mostly in California). And there you have it. Proof that those who slurp up trends like prostitutes earning their first crack dollar of the day will do almost anything as long as someone else says it makes you cool. Can someone please popularize suicide next?

Amazing Underwater Photography by Alex Semenov (23 Pics)

Drew — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:06:04 +0000

Monsters and jellies and sea-labia, oh my! Alexander Semenov has posted just a small taste of his underwater photography from the White Sea Biological Station in Russia.

More photographs as well as organism descriptions can be found here. If these blobs of goo are so dumb, how come they’re able to communicate using beautiful rainbow light displays? If humans are so goddamn smart, why are we always arguing always semantics and the meanings of words and concepts which we made up in the first place? Riddle me that, caption ding dong.

You Shouldn’t Wear That Fedora (31 Pics)

Drew — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:02:47 +0000

That fedora sure makes you look like a dingus. You Shouldn’t Wear That Fedora attempts to show the world why fedoras are unnecessary and even detrimental to your mental health (because they have brain-penetrating d*cks built into the forehead part).

Here are some of the best (?) from the anti-fedora Tumblr. Save the herbs; stop wearing fedoras. As if you weren’t awkward enough, a crooked square hat mushed onto your meaty head isn’t helping.

Worst Robbery Ever (Video)

Drew — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:00:28 +0000

This was just a practice robbery. A warm-up. Next, they’re going to Trailer Park Boys an entire ATM.

Chip bandit strikes again. He’s a white male, 5’9 with high cholesterol and reeking of weed. Unique markings: greasy face. Leaves trail of plastic bags in his wake.

Security Guards Caught Sleeping On The Job (30 Pics)

Mikey — Tue, 22 May 2012 07:08:48 +0000

You know you are in safe hands with these snoozing security guards keeping an eye out for trouble – not!

Cats Vs Treadmill (Video)

Mikey — Tue, 22 May 2012 06:51:47 +0000

This video is YouTube gold… two cats, one treadmill. Now you might be thinking how can this video be so good? Well, I’m betting you’ll laugh at it even if you hate cats. Yes, it’s that good. Don’t believe me? Hit play.

34 Hot Sweaty Girls (Pics)

Drew — Mon, 21 May 2012 18:04:16 +0000

Remember this? “Girl I want to make you sweat / Sweat till you can’t sweat no more / And if you cry / I’m gonna push it some, mo-o-ore”

Wow, what a rapey song! It came out in 2004, and those who were kids at the time are only now realizing how awful the lyrics sound. I guess they’re listed as “And if you cry out,” which makes it sound more consensual…but I was always hearing “And if you cry,” making it rape-tastic.

Here are some sweaty girls who are pumping Inner Circle jams while getting buff, brah.